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Ms. Elaine Kneeous

Jennifer is a one in a million stay-at-home mom. (More like one OF a million stay at home moms!) She graduated from a liberal arts college but there is nothing liberal OR artsy about her. She is married to Kevin Fischer of This Just In, and together they have a beautiful young daughter Kyla Audrey. In no particular order she loves dogs, wine, a good bargain, her family, pizza, and entertaining. Follow her blog of all things miscellaneous including but not limited to cooking and baking, entertaining and party planning, being a mommy, and homekeeping.

Guess who's coming to dinner!

I’m not a warp-drive, hyper-speed kind of person.  I’ve had to slow my pace just trying to get out the door to run errands, thanks to a pokey almost-four-year-old who makes a major production out of leaving.

While I don’t like to be rushed, I’m not on the tortoise end of the spectrum either.  I don’t shovel food into my mouth as if it’s my last meal but I probably eat too fast for what is considered optimal health.  Why, just the other day I was wondering “Do I eat too fast and therefore too much?”  (Um, no I really wasn’t wondering that.)

But in case you have been wondering that, you can now fork over (pun intended) a mere $99.00 for a gadget that looks like it is designed for toddlers learning to feed themselves.  Instead, this device is meant to tell you if you’re shoveling like you’re famished or savoring like you’re French.

Ah, yes, the French.  They tell us they’re the only ones who can make good on the grape.  (See “whine” under Culinary No-No Bonuses.)  We’re to believe they’re the only ones who can rock a Roquefort, craft a crepe, or produce a mousse.  Now those patronizing Parisians developed electronic cutlery designed to space your forkfuls so that you have time to chew each one properly.”

Nothing like having Your Mother + Big Brother join you for a meal.

More.

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